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THIS IS FROM MY LAST BLOG POST OVER AT ALL DAY, ALL NIGHT WRITING DIVAS. I WANTED TO POST IT HERE SO ALL MY QUACKINGALONE PEEPS COULD CHECK IT OUT:

I read a great piece from The Huffington Post by research psychologist Dr. Peggy Drexler. I'm a research lawyer, so I felt a certain sense of professional attachment before I read the piece. Her article was titled "Why Can't Men Love Like Women?" 

Dr. Drexler said that one of her friends was complaining about love trouble. Now that's a familiar topic, right? This friend was worried that her relationship might be in the weeds because her man didn't understood what she needed and refused to tell her what he needed. The doctor wondered if her friend was imagining trouble because she was "confusing love with the expression of love."

The article makes the case that men and women love differently and there are biological and anatomical reasons for the differences. The article cites studies by Dr. Robin Gur who claims to have brain imaging showing that the male and female brains aren't wired the same way.

...continue reading "MEN CAN’T LOVE LIKE WOMEN — UNLESS THEY’RE HEROES IN A ROMANCE NOVEL"

A new study claims that women who take charge at home have less sex than those who don't.  It looked at women who made household decisions like managing the budget, shopping, handling doctor's appointments and scheduling social activities.   It says that women who take charge of such things "can find themselves waiting 100 times longer for passion than those who do things jointly with their partner."

Researches say that there's a sliding scale - the  more decisions women make on their own, the less likely they are to have sex. 

The co-author of the study, Carie Muntifering said, "‘Understanding how women’s position in the household influences their sexual activity may be an essential piece in protecting the sexual rights of women and helping them to achieve a sexual life that is safe and pleasurable."

The study claims that for men, making decisions by themselves does not relate to the timing of sex.  So it's only the little women who are expected never to make a decision.  Men, apparently, are expected to be "bossy." 

I guess the authors of the study want women to stop making decisions.  Women who don't make decisions clearly can't work outside the home.  They also can't work inside the home.  They can't drive, do housework, or raise children.  What's left?  Women could sit, smile and look pretty I guess. 

Oh, no - wait.  Women couldn't do that either. They'd have to decide what to wear, how to make themselves up, how to do their hair and they'd even have to decide to sit down.  In the era of Pan Am and The Playboy Club, this study seems to fit right in.

Sexist, much?

 

When Grey's Anatomy ended last season I was still new to Twitter.  I hadn't yet picked up on the magic of hashtags (#). And I surely didn't know that by choosing the right hashtags, I could converse with other Grey's fans about the show while I watched it. 

This premiere was different.  This time, I had people in my twitterfeed who were Grey's fans and I used a couple of different hashtags.  There are probably a bunch for the show, but the 2 I used were #Greys and #GreysAnatomy.

Through the vast twittersphere, narrowed to focus on one little segment - Grey's fans - I was able to experience the show in the virtual company of tweeps who love and understand the show.  Since my household is all male,  I've never had the chance to get insights from interested, knowledgeable peeps while I watched before.  It makes Grey's an interactive event.

One of the folks I follow is bestselling romance author Carly Phillips.  And when Owen and Cristina were separated, while Owen blustered because Cristina didn't want to have the baby she was carrying, Carly tweeted this: 

...continue reading "Experiencing Grey’s Premiere Through The Twitterscope"

Recently, Forbes published a list of the 10 Happiest Jobs.  It followed publication of their list of the 10 Most Hated Jobs.  The only thing about the Forbes' list that really shocked me was that "author" didn't rank as the #1 Happy Job.  That's where it would place on my list. 

What was the biggest difference in the happy and the unhappy list? Forbes says "One set of jobs feels worthwhile, while in the other jobs, people can’t see the point." 

Here are the 10 happiest jobs:

1.  Clergy: 2. Firefighters: 3. Physical therapists: 4. Authors: 5.  Special education teachers: 6. Teachers: 7. Artists: 8. Psychologists: 9. Financial services sales agents: 10. Operating engineers.

Here are the 10 most hated jobs:

1. Director of Information Technology: 2. Director of Sales and Marketing; 3. Product Manager; 4. Senior Web Developer; 5. Technical Specialist; 6. Electronics Technician; 7. Law Clerk; 8. Technical Support Analyst; 9. CNC Machinist; 10. Marketing Manager.

If I had to put on my Swami Hat - and in this blog, I do, I really do - then I'd guess that what makes the happy list are jobs that give workers freedom to exercise independent judgment in a creative way.  Every job on the happy list does just that.  On the other hand, the jobs on the unhappy list  are tasks that are fairly rigid in their requirements and don't allow room for independence or personality. 

I still say that Forbes got it wrong.  The happiest job in the universe has to be working as a full time author. You get complete independence and creative control and if something isn't going the way you like - you just re-write it.

You know what?  I'm sure Forbes got it wrong. Author should be #1.  I DEMAND A RECOUNT.... especially if we get to go to Florida for it.  My eldest is in school in the City where Mickey Mouse lives. 

Recount, anyone? Or maybe a picket line.  We could all carry signs and chant lines from our favorite romance novels.  See - it would even be an entertaining kind of protest!

Yep, peeps, once again my daring co-horts over at All Day, All Night Writing Divas have unleashed the crazy duck lady.  It was my turn to blog and instead of reporting me and calling for me to be committed, they just let me rip.  Would you read a blog crazy enough to let me post?

Anyway, this month I'm blogging about a great piece over at Huffpo by Dr. Drexler.  It's all about how men love and it contains some real surprises. I might post it here after it comes down at the other site, but you don't want to wait.  Trust me. 

So quack on over and read it this minute. Be sure to leave a comment because I'd love to hear your thoughts.

In the course of my internet boogling this week, I ran across a link to this list of the 20 Most Prolific Authors And Writers In Literary History.  As I perused it my brain came to a screeching halt - okay that's not so unusual.  But this list is of some darned unusual folks. And keep in mind that it's the duck lady calling someone strange. 

The info is doubtless dated a bit by now, but even if some other folks have managed the mind-bending feat of scampering onto this list, it in no way diminishes the "wow" factor of the achievement of these authors.  By all the faeries on the Isle of Skye, take a look at the numbers.

The most prolific author remains a lady who passed away in 1973 - Mary Faulkner of South Africa.  I'm guessing that between 1903 and 1973 there must not have been a lot of TV in South Africa.  No, I know what it was.  The internet wasn't sapping everyone's attention.  Then again, people were still writing on typewriters.  Hmm.  However she managed it, Mrs. Faulkner wrote 904 books.  Yes. You read that right - 904 books.

She wrote under a bunch of pen names including Kathleen Lindsay. Her romances include "There is No Tomorrow," "Wind of Desire," and "Harvest of Deceit."  I'm wondering if I checked one of hers out from my local library as a teenager.  I found a book there that I flat out adored and it was shelved near Johanna Lindsay's work.  Years later, before I'd ever written a word, I was looking for that book and emailed Ms. Johanna Lindsay because I thought it was one of hers.  She replied and said that based on my description it sounded very interesting but that it wasn't hers.  She  suggested that I write it myself. 

Some years later I proceeded to write a number of books - but I haven't made 20 yet so Ms. Faulkner's record sure looks safe from me.  But I've never written one based on my faint memories of that earlier book by someone that I'm sure I read somewhere.  Of course, by the time I emailed Ms. Johanna Lindsay I'd read more romance novels that you could shake a stick at and I'd already started mulling over how I'd write one of my own. So Johanna was right on track to suggest that I write it myself - she likely suspected that the plot I recited didn't belong to anyone else.

Now, I'm wondering if my mystery book might have been one of Ms. Faulkner's. They don't seem to be widely available a'tall.  And the truly aggravating part is that when I see them sold somewhere, the stores don't include a description of the book. Why on earth wouldn't they describe the book? I'm not buying a pig from anyone's poke - including the most prolific writer in history.

A man named Lauran (Paine) wrote 850 books. Another, Prentiss Ingram, wrote over 600 books, mostly dime novels.  He wrote a bunch of Buffalo Bill stuff and sometimes wrote a 35,000 word book overnight.  Okay, 35K is a darned short book, even in today's ebook age, but it's still a heck of an achievement.

There's no way on God's little green planet that I'd even touch the last author on the list - L.T.  Meade who wrote 258 children's books.  I could give it a shot, but I'm not sure that there's enough coffee in the galaxy to fuel the effort, and I'm positive the Graham budget wouldn't stretch to funding bionic fingers.

But I'm surely quacking full of admiration for all of the authors who were energetic enough and imaginative enough to make this list.      

......maybe if I mainlined the coffee.......

Normally I blog about the world of romance novels. Many of those blogs talk about the heroes I love to write.

Without fail, the heroes of my books are strong, determined and courageous men. By the end of my Forever Series all of the heroes must face and overcome their worst fear for love. I like to think that any of my heroes would've run into the Twin Towers to help save the innocent victims of hate.  But it's easy to write pretend heroes. 

It's far harder to comprehend the amazing strength, courage, determination and dedication of the men and women of New York City's Fire Department, Police Department, and Transit Police.  They charged into what must have been a nightmare beyond their worst imaginings.  All of them saved lives, but not all of the life-savers were able to preserve their own.

And the men and women who went to work that day at the Twin Towers and in the Pentagon - many of them didn't make it back home either.  None of the victims on the four planes survived, but one group of the victims - on Flight 93 - transformed themselves into heroes who charged the cockpit.  They thwarted the terrorists' intent to kill innocent men and women in the US Capitol and they saved the building.  It stands today, still, as a monument to the greatest country on earth and it stands as an eternal tribute to those heroes of Flight 93.

Thousands of America's finest men and women died on 9/11/2001.  They were all husbands, wives, lovers, children, parents, grandchildren, or  grandparents. And they all died for no other reason than that they were Americans.  Yes, some fine citizens of many countries died on 9/11.  Their deaths were, however, collateral damage - which may, if anything, make their loss even harder for their loved ones.  I don't mean to diminish their deaths, but the target of the terrorists' attack was the American victims.

Again, the Americans who died that day left us only because they were Americans.  None of them was specifically targeted. They just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time - except for the fire fighters, NYPD Police and Transit Police.  All of the rescuers charged into harm's way. But what had America done to earn such hatred? Nothing. Nothing at all.

The evil terrorists are from a group of people who adhere to an ideology that holds nothing as sacred as the belief that their way is the only way.  They hate the way Americans live and love and they resent the way Americans succeed and persevere.  They hate most what Americans love most - freedom.  They wanted to destroy us on 9/11 and they want to destroy us today. They haven't succeeded and they won't succeed. 

But in the decade since 9/11 all of us have had to live with the memory of that day.  And too many wives, husbands, lovers, children, grandchildren, parents, grandparents and friends have had to do something that may have been even harder than charging into those buildings. They've had to survive and carry on when they really wanted to sit down, give up and stop.  All of them are heroes and heroines. 

Too many great Americans died that day.  None of them died in vain.  And I'm writing this blog to say that they may have died, but they are not gone.  They will never be gone.  As long as we carry all of those people in our hearts, they will all stay here with us.  Those we love never leave us unless we let them go.

Ceremonies will be held to honor and mourn the loss of the victims, and to remember the day that America can never be allowed to forget.  As those ceremonies are held, and later, as we visit the memorial sites, we should all look around and we'll see them there, standing proud and vibrant and alive.  They will comfort those who mourn them and they will embrace those who love them.  And as long as we teach our children about 9/11, the victims will continue to live as victors who have already outlasted one of those who hated America most. They will continue to live long after the last adherent of the philosophy of hate has died unmourned and soon forgotten.

As long as we love them and keep them with us, neither America nor their loved ones will ever lose the 9/11 victims.  We can keep those lost on 9/11 with us as victors, kept with us forever by the greatest force in all of the universe -- love.

I hope that the families feel their loved ones' presence, their comfort and their strength as we reach the tenth anniversary of their deaths and that they continue to hold onto their loved ones as the families strive, survive, succeed and endure.  Those who passed in the tragedies of  9/11/2001  will be with us on 9/11/2011.  If we keep them in our hearts the victims of 9/11 will be with us still as the first decade becomes the second, the third, the tenth and the twentieth.

Love is the force that will always vanquish hate and that is why those we love never leave us, unless we let them go. So we will never really lose those 9/11 victims turned victors.  As always, the real losers are those who choose hatred and terror rather than love and liberty.

We've made it over the hump in a short week.  If I perch on my tippytoes I can just make out the weekend - getting closer every second.

Why are short weeks so much busier than long weeks?  Crises and deadlines wait for the short weeks.  I picture them behaving a little like the faeries in some of my historicals - plotting to pop in at the very worst time.

In honor of our having made it over the hump, I give you a link to the movie - Lord Love A Duck.  And yeah, there's even a quacking duck in the theme song. I've already asked my DH to download the song on the USB stick. It's full of oldies from the real era of music - the 70s to the 80s. I boogle down the road in my little red PT Cruiser, bopping to the beat of the same music that inspires my muse.

This movie has Roddy McDowell and Tuesday Weld. Can't believe I'd never heard of it before!  But any movie smart enough to pay tribute to ducks in its title and theme song gets my vote.  I'll have to watch the whole thing - sometime.  I stay pretty busy between the full time day job and the writing that is trying to grow up into a full time job.

So, without further ado - turn up your speakers and click for : 

Lord Love A Duck

I love historical romance. The news around us is so very grim. Our economy has been down for so long that it keeps dragging us down with it.  So many people are unemployed, underemployed or working two or three jobs to survive. The worse today gets, the more tempting historical romance looks.  In trying times historical romance is an oasis from the desert of reality.  I get that. I really, really get that. 

But you know what I think too many people forget, overlook or don't realize? Contemporary romance done right provides the same kind of escape. It may provide an even better escape. Think about it.  We can see our world, our time in new and exciting ways by reading contemporaries.  Contemporaries remind us that times can get better, will get better.  They can even inspire us to change some things we're doing in order to make our reality a better place to live.

So, let's hear it for contemporary romance.  

...continue reading "Today’s A Pretty Quacking Place Too"

2

In MaryAnneia people, places and things have personalities.  Sometimes they're happy, sometimes they're sad and sometimes they're just in a mood to piss me off.  Yes, Virginia, things have issues too. Or at least - my things do.

For example, take my office computer - please.  Nah, I guess I'll keep it.  In fact, some days, I'd fight you for it.  Others, I'd throw it across the parking lot and dance on its digital corpse.  I have a love/hate relationship with the thing.  In the morning, it doesn't want to wake up from its long nap. I don't either, so I sympathize. By the time she's up and perking, I'm mighty glad to have her help.  But she's a drama queen.  When I'm heads down on a deadline, focused on whatever words I'm writing at the time, most of my attention is not on the machine. And the machine doesn't like that. So she'll throw up a weird error or suddenly, for no apparent reason, Word, Outlook, or Practice Advantage will die.  I'll yell at her and Glenda, my co-worker in the next office, will chuckle and encourage me to teach the PC who is the boss.  (I pretend I am).

My car - a little red P.T. Cruiser - is my baby.  Like a baby, sometimes she gurgles and purrs and boogles right along. And sometimes she doesn't.  I often stroke her and encourage her. But sometimes I yell - like when I know the idiot in the other lane is trying to speed up to get in front of me. "Don't let the jackass in, P.T., I'll scream."

Don't get me started on my ice maker.  It exists to aggravate me.  It'll be churning right along and then, for no reason, it refuses to sweep out the ice cubes so that more water can pour in.  Or cubes get stuck half in and half out of the sweeper.  And there I'll be, with whatever kitchen implement I can grab, pouring or poking or prodding. All the while, I'll be inventing new vile names for the beast until my 14-year-old, Sam, yells in, "You tell it, Mom."

It hadn't occurred to me how much of MaryAnneia has crept into my books until I read a reader comment. 

...continue reading "Things Are People Too"