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Author: Mary Anne

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Big news in the Grey's world - Isaiah Washington, a/k/a Dr. Preston Burke, Cristina Yang's version of Dr. McDreamy, is returning for an episode in May.  Grey's fans will recall that Cristina cut her teeth on Burke's wisdom, and became more than his muse - for a while, after an injury, she was his hands.  Yes, Cristina learned those amazing cardiac skills as an intern by illegally performing complex cardiac surgical procedures on patients while her lover, Burke talked her through them.

Washington was famously fired after an anti-gay slur on the set against fellow cast member T.R. Knight - George O'Malley.

At the time, Burke and Cristina were getting married.  Yes, Virginia, Yang got corralled into a big, traditional, totally not-Cristina-style formal Church wedding.  It didn't happen because Cristina ran away, almost literally at the altar.

So, how will Shonda Sunshine Rhimes write his return?  Here's my thought.  We all saw in the last episode that divorced spouses Cristina and Owen had sex.  Later, the girlfriend Owen was about to move in with went all traditional spouse on him, telling him that she wants kids and wants to be home with the kids, walking them to school.  That prompted Owen to break up with the girlfriend, taking her out to dinner to tell her that he didn't want that.  He wants a wife who is involved in her career, a surgeon with whom he can discuss surgery and medicine.

That sounds --- an awful lot like Cristina, doesn't it?  It sounds like Owen wants the wife he had.

So, Sunshine could play it that way.  Perhaps, Owen and Cristina will reunite, taking it slowly, at first, but then deciding to go "all in."  This time, they'll go "all in."  It may be his idea or it may be hers, a reaction to her history.  But they could decide to schedule a big ole' Church wedding.  Only, in Shonda Sunshineland, history tends to repeat itself and things end up where they started.

So, I think Cristina may show up at the Church, all dressed in white, and the wedding march will play (sound familiar?) - only, at the last minute, she can't do it.  She just can't do it.  And she runs out of the Church, down a flight of stairs, to find a posh, luxury car (I see it as a convertible, but it could be a limo ).  And the driver is - yes, you got it - Preston Burke.  He looks at Cristina and says something like, "Going somewhere?" or "I thought you might need a ride."

And Cristina gets in the car.  As Burke speeds away, she asks him, "Where are we going?" And he answers, "Where we were always meant to be." Cristina snarks, "And where is that?" And Burke answers, "Together."{   And Cristina doesn't snark.  She thinks, and smiles and nods........  and they drive off, into a joint future as the hotshot couple of cardio.....

I could be wrong.  Burke could show up just to say, "I came to see if you'd really do it this time." Or something similar, but Sunshine does love her circles.  I DO NOT, IN ANY WAY, SHAPE OR FORM SUPPORT WASHINGTON'S ANTI-GAY SLUR, but I think he's been interviewed a lot in the intervening years. I hope, and believe that his attitude has changed.  And I think Shonda thinks that's true because otherwise, regardless of how tempting the prospect, I think she'd have written it differently.

Regardless, in strict show terms, I think Derek is Meredith's McDreamy, and I think Burke is Cristina's.  Having her end up with anyone else would just seem wrong.

We shall see, right Grey's fans?  And while we wait, don't forget to pick up my tribute to Grey's Anatomy, Dangerous Relations:  Griffin's Law.

 

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I've gotten several emails lately asking me whether I'd ever write more "Forever" books. We all agree that Vlad's story needs to be told, right? So, the answer is - yes, but it will be a while. Why?

My erotic romances written as Olivia Outlaw outsell all my other books combined. I'm trying to write my way to writing full time so it only makes sense that I concentrate on the erotic romance for now. That would change if my "Forever Series" and other historicals start outselling everything else. They have a way to go -- a long way -- before they'd even come close to equaling the erotic work. If y'all want more Forever books in a hurry - go out and help me market the things! Pass the word on Twitter, do some blogs, bother some big name reviewers...

In the meantime, while I've got my Outlaw fingers working, I'm sharing a funny video. (BTW, I don't really hate my coworkers a'tall and most days - this past Friday was NOT one of them - most days, I don't even hate my boss. I just hate working a job that is ANY job other than writing romance full time) If y'all would rather not be doing your current day job, maybe you'll enjoy this one too.

Heck, who am I kidding? Even if you LOVE your day job you're going to enjoy this one. Hunky men, business shirts and ties, skimpy undies, high heels and KILLER legs. ENJOY!

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This is a quick post - and I'm stealing time from my muse to blog.  Snatching it from her greedy, absorbed, self-involved genius.  Because muse is absorbing me so, what else could I write about but her? (Are you happy now, Ms. Muse? Will you give me a sec to do this?)

As my "nom de plume" Olivia Outlaw, Ms. Muse has been working my imagination like a Sports Reporter on Super Bowl Sunday.  We're still working on the story of Ring and Ali - my Sultan's Toy series. As you can tell, it's going like gangbusters. Musey really adores the 20-30k format of erotic romance and she's having a mighty fine time with her first male/male romance. I'll definitely have to do another sometime soon.......

But for now, we're busy with Ring and Ali who are still in Turkey, in the Sultan's Palace.  (For now....)

And sometimes, my dearest darling Hubby will summon me, or the kids will pop up, wide-eyed by my monitor, or life, generally will require me to stop writing to sleep, eat, clean, work or get kids ready for school.  Lately, I've often looked up with that lost, strained expression at whoever or whatever is calling me away.

My Darlin' Mr. Duck could describe the expression for you - because it has annoyed him often enough - but you've probably never seen it unless you're the poor unfortunate family member of a writer.

And remember, sometimes we're writing when we're NOT at the keyboard. Muse may be whispering in my ear while we're driving somewhere or right in the middle of dinner.  When that happens, Mr. Duck will often break off in the middle of what he's saying to grouch something like:  "Are you listening to me?  Are you paying attention?"

I'll respond, "Yes. Of course," or something like that because - I'm really, really trying to listen and pay attention. It's just that muse is really tough to ignore. It's like trying to ignore a neon sign 5-feet in front of your face flashing thoughts in red and purple to the beat of the best song of all time. (Bob Seegar's Night Moves). It's really, really HARD.

It may be difficult to convince most non-writers that the world of a Grand Sultan's Palace in long-ago, far-away Turkey is more real than the world outside the window or inside your house -- but it's true. It's really, really true.

That is, it's true when I'm very lucky and my Muse is sitting on my shoulder, whispering in my ear. With my Olivia Outlaw cap on, and my fingers typing away at Part 3 of "The Sultan's Toy", Muse has been doing that a lot lately. Just now, Muse is occasionally distracting me from Part 3 with thoughts of -- what should I title this one?

I'm doing the "C" thing for all the stories - and I'm considering:  Captivated, Coupled and Consumed. What to do, what to do.....

I can't even be distracted from my distraction for long because Muse is back, whispering in my ear and tapping her high-heeled shoes on my chest.  After a while, that really hurts, you know?

So, send some good wishes to Mr. Duck and the Duck Clan as they try NOT to kill me for being even MORE distracted than usual - which is really saying something.  But all this distraction means something I'm hoping that Olivia Outlaw's readers will find mighty interesting........

Whatever it ends up being titled - Part 3 of "The Sultan's Toy" will be winding its way to your favorite online retailer very, very soon.

And - thank you Muse! I'm living for the day when I have no day job to distract me from my shoulder sessions with my very own, beloved, well-Mused one.......

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Published on 2 Comments on Why I Insist On Happy Endings

Last night in boogling around the vast expanse of offerings by Time Warner Cable, I ran across a channel running "Brokeback Mountain." As y'all know, as 'Olivia Outlaw' I've ventured into the world of erotic romance with my ongoing series:  Sultan's Toy - Book One (Captured) and Book Two (Claimed) are available on Amazon now. (Grab 'em before you read the rest of this.  I'll wait....)

And yes, I'm hard at work on Book Three as we speak. It'll be out soon - and I'll surely announce here when it's available.

Anyway, Sultan's is my first adventure into male/male romance, so I thought the time might be right to watch "Brokeback Mountain." I started watching it, but then, I had that thought, you know, THE thought.  I've never heard how it ended.  Oh, I recall people raving about it, but none of those raves  mentioned feeling all happy,  squishy and warm at the ending.  And that sounded an alarm bell in my head, a loud one, like the annoying Emergency Warning System. A local TV station runs the "test" before 6:30 am when I'm trying to chug my first cup of caffeine and wondering when I'll be able to write full time and arise at a decent hour. You really can't ignore that alarm.

I paused the beginning of "Brokeback" and went to the Great Googled One to do a search.  I typed in, "Does Brokeback Mountain Have a Happy Ending?' I no sooner hit enter than the first item on the list said - "one of them is beaten to death at the end."  Well, great quacking ducks!  Thank God for warning bells. You know what I did, don't you?  Yep.  I flipped back, turned off "Brokeback," kicked on "Amazon Prime" and watched an episode of BBC's Sherlock Holmes.

See, I don't "do" unhappy endings in entertainment.  Never. Ever.  I'm serious about that - so serious that I refuse to watch "Titanic."  I hear the ship sinks.

By trade, I am a lawyer. I'm toiling away at that until I can earn enough money at my writing to allow me to do it full time.  Don't get me wrong - I'm a "scrivener" which means I do legal research and writing for a living. So I write at work too. (It's the only thing I'm anywhere near good at, after all.) But none of the writing is happy. People involved in lawsuits rarely are joyous about it, of course, but so often the weight of the tragedy is nearly overwhelming - the destruction, the injuries, the sorrow.

And when I leave work and come home, to update myself, I'll flick on some news.  In today's 24-hour-everything world, it's not hard to find.  And I hear about school shootings and monsters planning to attack Olympic athletes who've dedicated their lives to become the best of the best and are willing to use their skills in their country's honor.

Enough. It's enough.

If I want sadness and tragedy, I'll go to work or watch the news. When I want to entertain myself, I EXPECT authors, actors, movie producers, TV showrunners, directors and all the others providing possible entertainment choices to have enough common sense to know they have one goal - Give it to me with a happy ending.

It's the one promise I make to all my readers whether I'm writing as "Mary Anne Graham" or "Olivia Outlaw" - at the end of my story, the characters will have a happy ending. Y'all can take that to the bank.

As readers or viewers, we can choose whether we want to end feeling all hopeless and despondent or uplifted and encouraged - why would we ever pick misery? Aren't all of our daily lives full of enough of that already? I'm up for almost any journey that a talented creator contrives, as long as it arrives at an ending that makes me happy.

Misery may love company but Happy Endings make you feel at home.

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Hi, it's your crazy duck lady writing as Olivia Outlaw here.

I just wanted to let those readers who have already picked up Captured(The Sultan's Toy:  Book One) know that I am hard at work on Book Two of Ring and Ali's story as we speak.  I really hope y'all enjoyed Book one, because I really enjoyed writing it.  I'm having even more fun writing Book Two, which should be out in the very immediate future - in the next week or so, I'm certain.

One of my favorite things about erotic romance is that it tends to be shorter than historical romance.  Another of my favorite things about erotic romance is that what drives the story is the erotic encounters between the lead characters.  What that means, dear readers, is that the sex must "draw back the curtains" not only on bedroom events, but on the characters, their romance and the problems interfering with their HEA.

Oh, the entire story isn't told through the sex, of course.  But even the parts that occur between the sex are highly charged.  Essentially, if the characters are not in bed at the time, you've no doubt that they will be back there soon.

It's a lot like romance told through ONLY the good parts.

If you've never read erotic romance or a male/male romance, you should pick up  Captured(The Sultan's Toy:  Book One) and give it a read.  I'll bet that if you do, you'll be a fan of the genre and - you'll be eager to see what happens next between Ring and Ali as Ring gets used to the palace in Turkey that houses Sultan Ali, his brother, Sultan Kaan, and their Father, Grand Sultan Osman.  Book One will tell you about Ring's harrowing and erotic adventures after he awakens to find he's been captured off the streets of London.  His captors are readying him to be The Sultan's Toy -

But human toys sometimes cause human complications, don't they?

Some like it hot and some like it hotter - and some like them both over the top!  Give Captured(The Sultan's Toy:  Book One) a read - either because you're a fan of erotic romance or because you enjoy my work as Mary Anne Graham. You must might be as "quackers" as I am over Ring and Ali...

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I haven't blogged in quite some time. That's because I've been busy writing.

As me, myself and I - Mary Anne Graham - I just put out the first in a new series. My "Lovely Lairds" series will consist of 3 books that follow a trio of Highland Lairds as they meet their matches. The first, Romancing The Rose, is out and about now everywhere, or almost everywhere, including Amazon - which is where the above link goes.  (I love my Kindle Fire even if it is the version from several years ago.  Got my youngest a newer, HD (refurbished) version for Christmas and he hasn't even set it up yet! Can't pry that kid away from all those computer games.)

Be sure to check out Romancing The Rose.   I got lots of fan mail asking me to set a series in the Highlands because so many people enjoyed my book that is a permafreebie everywhere, the lead to my Forever Series, A Faerie Fated Forever.  If you haven't read Faerie yet, there is Zero reason not to pick it up for your ereader - yes ZERO, like the price! Once you have that one, be sure to pick up all the Forever books.  Ahead on my writing horizon, but a wee bit down the road, is Vlad's story.  It's written in my head.  I just have to get it down on my keyboard....

But Muse has been so active of late, making up for a period of a little while back when the fickle wench left me altogether, that I've had to --- CREATE ANOTHER ME.  Yes, dear duckly readers, I introduce you to the dirtier, more sensual side of your favorite duck lady.....  Olivia Outlaw.   That's my new "pen name" for my brand new series of erotic romances.  Why Olivia Outlaw?  Well, believe it or not, friendly duck fiends, "Outlaw" is my maiden name.  It was quite a moniker for a lawyer - which is still my day job until I can give it up to write full time.  My first boss used to joke, a lot, about how he hired an Outlaw while a nearby firm hired a new associate whose last name was.... Justice.

Outlaw captures the rebellious feelings of my new writing identity perfectly.  And I chose "Olivia" because it sounds so darned good with Outlaw.  Anyway, Ms. Olivia Outlaw is a much more in-your-face sexual kind of lady.  I've been told that my Forever Series, in particular, is quite sexual -- too much for some reviewers' tastes.  While that is true, in all my other romances the characters' relationships, their histories, or events move the stories along.  In "erotic romance" it's the sex that actually advances the story.  While that is something of a technical difference, it is a very important one.

I decided to create a "pen name" so that readers not willing to boogle over to the dark and delicious side of love with me can still enjoy my other, more traditional tales.  When you see one written by me as "Olivia Outlaw", you'll know that it'll be shorter than my regular books -- much shorter -- but it'll be much, much, much - (Did I say much?) - SPICIER.  Ms. Outlaw's stories are downright out there, so much so that they come with their very own disclaimer!

My first "Olivia Outlaw" book is out and about now too.  It is a a 21,000 word novella that is Book One of a male/male romance series between an English Duke, Harrington Richards, the Duke of Devonshire (Ring) and Sultan Ali Paszade bin Osman (Note I don't say Grand Sultan.  The Grand Sultan is Ali's father.)  It's my "Sultan's Toy" series and the first is entitled:  Captured - Book One (The Sultan's Toy).   Again, the link goes to Amazon though it's available in most venues.

I'm already hard at work on Book Two of Ring and Ali's story.  The novellas are much shorter and faster to write, so I expect that Book Two will be available within the next 2 weeks, and possibly sooner.  If you're already a Ring and Ali fan, you won't have long to wait!  I'm loving this new genre and the novella format because it's like writing a book with so many "good parts" that the next steamy session is always only a few pages away.

How will my waddle into erotic romance work out?   That depends upon my quacking fine readers.  So far, sales of my Outlaw title are running substantially higher than sales of any other title, including A Sixth Sense of Forever, which is my Graham bestseller across the board.  That bodes well.  Besides, sometimes writing under a pen name turns out pretty fine.  There's a certain English lady named Erika Leonard who wrote a trio of books under the pen name E.L. James.   I hear that the "Fifty Shades" series turned out quite fine for Ms. Leonard, ahm, Ms. James, ahm -- bet she doesn't care as long as the royalties get deposited in the right account.

That's my attitude as well.   I'm hoping that Ms. Outlaw will help Ms. Graham write her way to freedom from her day job so that both of them can write full time!  You can help - pick up copies of BOTH Romancing the Rose and Captured - Book One (The Sultan's Toy) and you'll be contributing to my freedom fund.

And, I promise, I'll try not to stay away from the blog so long again.  We have all sorts of nifty news to consider and quack about and I know I've missed out on our pondside chats for a while.  That absence, more than anything, should tell you how much I'm enjoying writing the erotic romances.  If I can't tear myself away from writing them, I'm hoping you won't be able to tear yourself away from reading them!

HAPPY 2014 everyone - may this be the year that all our dreams become our realities!!

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So, "Thriller" starts with Arizona moving on......... with Leah.

"But I love your kids-"  Cristina.  No, you can't have it both ways.

And Bailey's hubby shows up.  I think she's gonna get her groove thing back - whether she likes it or not.  And she won't b/c Webber's gonna let a resident operate.

Zombies in the ER!! They attack!!  Of course. (So did Derek - first season...)

Der and Ben bond over butterfly surgery but Bailey's not feeling so festive.  The Chief throws her off his case because she doesn't want to teach............doesn't want to teach?  Bailey?  The Nazi?  How did everything get turned backwards?

It's not Seattle Grace anymore, is it?

Meredith and Cristina aren't even each other's person anymore.

And now the Chief wants Meredith back on his case.  And he apologizes.  And asks her to teach the interns.  Mer can't be the Nazi.  She's the Mama.

And the little girl Karev's been treating who could get scared to death -- of course she's the one who finds the patient only Shane can see.  "I see dead people........."

But Shane finds her and Karev finds the girl.

It's an UnHalloween.  It's all been a very, very UnHalloween.

It's the year without a Halloween..........

Ben tells Bailey he quit and Bailey asks........  You don't love it..........He says he loves her............and she says she's disappointed in him.  That's not the Nazi, not at all.

And Cristina brings cupcakes but Mer doesn't even know she came.  So Cristina goes out and becomes a Witch.

Jo breaks out of her cocoon and becomes a butterfly for Alex.

It's a very, very unHalloween.........

Cristina is getting smaller and smaller and smaller and soon she'll disappear.........

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The description of this epi worries me a bit.  It says Derek and Callie collaborate on a brain-mapping project.  Last week's epi ended with a showdown between Mer and Der.  So, Der may be in a bad place - feeling like he's being blamed for something he didn't do - those choices were Meredith's.  And Callie?  She's all over the map right now - a real emotional roller coaster.   They're already close enough for confidences based on the time Callie lived with Mer/Der.  I don't want them getting any closer -- that's what I'm saying.

There's Der lecturing interns about a new brain-mapping computer program - using the thoughts of a paraplegic about movement to demo.  Of course, they see something irregular on the paraplegic's brain during the study.  Callie should be there but she's MIA & Der agrees to look for her.  Still don't feel good about this, especially after the first shot at casa Mer/Der where Mer touches Der's shoulder and he shrugs her off.  He hasn't gotten over Mer's accusation that he stole her career.

And Mer hasn't gotten over the truth Cristina laid on her.  She's looking for a research project.

And Der brought a mug from home to work that he gives to Shane to put away.  Shane doesn't and when she goes into the Chief's room she sees it, shrugs it off and say, "I have a mug like that at home."  I have a bad, bad feeling about that mug too especially after one of the interns drops it and it shatters...

Der finds Callie later.  She says she wants off the project.  Yes, let it go!

Mer is shoving away the idea of finishing a research project of her Mother's.  She's still not ready to go there.

And Der's talking about fixing the paraplegic's brain with glue.  He wants to finish the project and refuses to let Der take out the sensors for the brain project unless he removes the tumor.  Der says that's too dangerous.  And Shane proposes glue to Cristina for a heart repair.

Dear Duck - Der goes after Callie again and she's gushing about how Der and Mer have it figured out - how they can make the pieces fit.  And Der looks guilty but says nothing.

Heart guy agrees to Cristina's suggestion about using glue - a brand new procedure - but he hopes he dies.  He and wifey sold everything and maxed out all the credit cards to enjoy life.  They planned to pay them off with life insurance.

And all of a sudden, Mer wants her mother's journal back.

But the intern glued the mug together.

Mer lays it on Cristina, says Cristina pushed her aside last week because Mer had a baby.  And Cristina doesn't have time for anything she can't relate to, that's different.

Der tells Mer he wants to spend more time on research, less on surgery so that she can concentrate on her work.  He'll be spending that time doing research with Callie and that still worries me - even while he's being all McDreamy.

And he puts the glued mug back in the cabinet.  The pieces are glued back together, but it's still broken.

And the mug still worries me............

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First - a thought about a different "Grey" - as in Fifty Shades of Grey.  Ya know who I think would make a freaking awesome Christian?  JESSE WILLIAMS.  Grey's Anatomy fans know that he plays Dr. Jackson Avery.  Take a look at these photos and tell me Jesse wouldn't make a mighty, mighty fine Christian!  It would launch his career into the stratosphere.  Unlike Charlie, I bet Jesse's time on Grey's Anatomy has prepared him for the journey.  Just sayin'.  Yo - EL James/Erika Leonard, are you listening?

Grey's begins with the greatest truth Meredith ever voiced over - Being a mother requires more commitment than anything else - even surgery.  Not a mother in America disagrees.

Bailey and Mer fight over a surgery.  That seems like old times, doesn't it?

Callie thinks she, Mer and Der are in a relationship.  She's channeling "Big Love."

Of course.  Jackson's Mom walks in while he's heading towards the nasty in the on call room with his intern.  The same intern who walked into the room to show Jackson the shirt she picked out to prove to his Mama that she was a serious surgeon - not a gold digger.  The impression Mama got?  That intern Stephanie is a temp.  You know what?  That's the same impression I have.

I'm wondering if the theme of this one is going to be "revelations."  Mama Avery is revealing some truth to Jackson about remembering his position.  Yep, Jackson was thinking about a lot of positions.

And there's a man in the ER with a very swollen penis.  It was bees.  He rattles off a story about being outside and making himself a peanut butter and honey sandwich and falling asleep, but yeah, he must've gotten some honey on his howz-it.  Even intern Stephanie doesn't believe that and she's swallowed a bunch of lines from Jackson.

Then Mer needs someone to take over for her at a princess party with Zola.  To show Z that she hasn't been replaced by her new brother.  But instead, Z gets replaced by.........  a can't miss surgery.  (How long before Mer starts channeling memories of her childhood, and all the tea parties Her mama skipped for all those can't miss surgeries?)

Stephanie has to go get Mama Avery for the Giant Penis guy.  Of course, she walks in saying:  "Dr. Avery, I have a Giant Penis."  It goes downhill from there, which speaks to the skill of Grey's writers.

Callie promises to be at Z's tea party by 6pm.  It won't matter.  Callie's great but Mer knows better than anyone that there is no substitute for Mama who says 6pm is too late for a tea party.  It has to be a 4pm.  And if there is no tea party she's already started turning into her Mama.  It didn't take long.......

Jo gives Karev a lecture about how he should go meet his father and bond with him. Karev says - discharge him.

It takes Mama Avery 1 minute, flat, to get Giant Penis guy to admit he put his penis in a hornet's nest.  It takes her less time to totally flatten any hope intern Stephanie had of impressing her about anything.

Penis guy isn't impressed either.  He's busy learning the price of discovery.  Revelations aren't all they're cracked up to be....

It's a wee bit..... or maybe a NOT SO WEE bit sad how fast they've got Mer bonding with Bailey over breastpumping and walking away from "a moment" with Cristina to pump and bond.  **Big Sigh**

Mama Avery tells the chief she's going to save penis man's manhood and wants to come back and have a long talk with the Chief about him coming home with her- the peeps at the hospital pamper him too much.

Jackson tells Stephanie to keep it medical with his Mama..... Of course, he's telling Steph that his Mama probably already forgot the on call room when Mama walks up saying how nice it is to see them together again, and dressed this time.

Jo tries to get Karev's Dad into a treatment plan.  He says no.  Then she tries to make Karev go stop his Dad from leaving and he says no.  Both guys scream at Jo.  You know what Jo - when you've got TWO men telling you to shut up and stay in your place - it means you're doing a bunch of stuff right.  You go girl.   She's really the only intern whose name I remember on a consistent basis.  I have to check with Dr. Google to figure out who the rest of 'em are.  We all know what that means, right?  Yep.  I haven't bonded with them.

Paging Shonda Sunshine --- hang onto as many of Grey's Greatest as you can or there won't BE a Grey's.

Mama Avery doesn't make the penis surgery easy for Jackson or Stephanie.  She tells her son - this is what happens when men put there penises in places they don't belong.

Mer has to run to Z when she falls and hurts herself.  Mer asks if leaving her hurt child for surgery doesn't sound a little Ellis Grey.  Karev tells her to relax, that she's a good mother.  But Mer sees the writing on the wall...

And Callie tells failing kidney woman's spare parts younger sister that she can say no.  And Callie tells herself that she can say no, too.

Penis man's Mama knew her son hurt himself by putting his penis in the hornets nest.  Apparently, getting stung is his thing.  Hey Penis Guy's Mom, Did you ever see an episode of Criminal Minds? Go buy the whole series -- fast.

Cristina kicks Mer out of the surgery.  She's been replaced by Bailey - the Doc she stole the surgery from.  Cristina doing the right thing?  That's not at all like Cristina.  That hurt - everyone.

The Chief tells Jo to stop coddling him.  If his white blood cells are low, he needs a proper exam.  Mama Avery walks in just then and the Chief tells her he can't go home with her - these fools need him.  He's right.

Callie runs into Owen whose not leaving because spare parts sister decided to donate her kidney after all.  Callie looks crushed.

Mer yells at Cristina for stealing the surgery.  Cristina tells Mer she's not as good a surgeon as Cristina is.  Cristina tells Mer she can't be a great Mom and a great surgeon.  She tells Mer she knows that Mer doesn't want to be her Mother.  She tells Mer that she let up, that she took a different road.  That they are in different places with different priorities ow, and that's okay.

And Callie kicks Arizona out.  She says she's tired of taking care of other people.  I'm not discussing Arizona.  I choose not to do that.

Intern Stephanie sits down at Joe's with Mama Avery and tries to call her to account.  Mama Avery tells Stephanie that the reason she didn't have time to put in the catheter was that she didn't diagnose correctly.  Steph says she didn't have all the info.  Mama says, When in doubt presume he put it somewhere it shouldn't have been.

Mer yells at Derek.  For making her choose.  Derek tells Mer he never made her choose. Did he?

No - probably not.  Mer just never realized that in each little choice, she was making a bigger one.  That's her revelation.   Sometimes the job we ended up doing isn't the one we wanted.  I can relate.  I need to re-direct my day job into my dream job too.

CHECK OUT MY BOOKS - BUY ONE OR TWO OR FIVE AND HELP A LAWYER find her dream -- we all have to wait to see what Mer's dream turns out to be - but Shonda promised us that it would include Der.......

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UPDATE 10:17 at 1:30 pm:  :  Sometimes, it's hard being right - Publisher's Weekly just linked to this UK story by the UK Telegrah.  It's an interview with KOBO's CEO over the whole "porn purge." Notice the headline?  "KOBO porn scandal:   the end of self publishing?"  The publishers' push isn't so undercover anymore.....

 

In case you've been buried under a rock, vegetating with the 'shrooms, or swimming with the ducks and haven't heard - the Porn Prohibition has arrived.    You can catch up here via an excellent piece from The Digital Reader.

Basically, some publication dug up a story that combined porn and Amazon - I'm guessing that pub was very hungry for some dirt to boost ratings.  The pub found porn in Amazon's Kindle store and after that story broke, reader hungry pubs from all over the world began digging around and finding similar books on all sites.  Under heavy fire from one of the strangest moral coalitions in history,  all the sites began ducking for cover and ditching porn right and left.

I'll grant you - there are some HORRENDOUS things out there.  What's more, the worst of the worst sell the most of the most.  But caught up in the great purge are some fine erotica and even erotic romance works by excellent authors - excellent SELF PUBLISHED authors.  Because the moral coalition or the etailer sites - likely pushed, poked and prodded by traditional pubs who may have even fed the story to the first pub - decided that only self-published erotica was bad.  Traditionally published erotica is fine.  (The moral distinction of that escapes me.  The common sense also escapes me - the etailers like Amazon, KOBO, Barnes and Noble are all siding with the publishers who stayed in business all these years by deciding people were too stupid to figure out what they wanted to read on their own.  People should only read what publishers thought they should be allowed to read.)

Anyway, Jeff Bezos, Amazon and all the others have joined the "our readers are idiots" bandwagon being pulled by the moral coalition and the traditional publishers.  The justification for all of it?  That "those books" are right there on digital shelves where children can see them.  The only solution is a prohibition style shelf sweeping of all erotic works by all SELF-PUBLISHED authors.  Why is that the only solution? BECAUSE IT'S THE ONLY SOLUTION THAT WILL HELP KEEP TRADITIONAL PUBLISHING COMPANIES IN BUSINESS.

The publishers are all so desperate at the surge in reader acceptance of indie work that they've forgotten that readers were never actually stupid.  The stupidity was always on the publishers side of the scale.  Yep,  I think the publishers finally drank their own Kool Aid.  The readers know there are lots of solutions that don't rob them of their independence and their right to choose what they do and don't want to read.  So the readers will likely wait it out until the hoopla dies down, things get back to normal, and they're in charge again.  Because control has passed.  That horse has left the barn.  The old normal is dead.  Forever and always dead - Thank You God.

There are a couple of reasons all this concerns me so much, the largest of which is that I was just underway with my first erotic romance/erotica work which I plan to put out under a pen name.  It'll be entirely separate from any of my deranged duckly doings.  See, a lot of writers of erotic romance/erotica make enough to write full time.  I think fate saw my intent and conspired with the publishers and the (not so) moral morons specifically to try to keep me tied to my day job.  (My boss may have even been in on the great conspiracy.  He may be even crazier than I am because he actually VALUES my legal writing/research.)

At the risk of tossing a dose of common sense big enough to put out the current witch-burning bonfires, I have a suggestion.  Why don't ALL the sites concerned about keeping young eyes off of books they shouldn't see agree on a standard.  They should require that everyone shopping on their site enter through a welcome screen at which they input their date of birth and certify their age.  Yes, people can lie, but people also show up with fake IDs and get into bars everyday.  We have to require some element of personal/parental responsibility, don't we?

Requiring all visitors to a site to enter their age lets the etailer screen out all kinds of products.  Underaged people wouldn't be able to see the wine or liquor section.  The sex toys and naughty nighties won't parade by their eyes.  And all kinds of books will be screened out -- because there are lots of books of all genres that people of certain ages may not be ready to read.  It won't matter who publishes those books - the subjects will actually decide what is screened - and lest we forget, that's allegedly the point of all this, right?

Never mind that those same kids can Google some terms and pull up stuff all over the internet that makes me - a MOST mature lady - go all wide eyed, look at Mr. Duck and say -- really?  There are people who are into THAT?  I don't know most of those sites but I'll lay you odds that most teens could give me a list.  But never mind that -- their young, impressionable minds could be protected by a simple welcome screen at which they enter their date of birth and certify their age.

Mind you, I don't expect my common sense suggestion to gain any traction because NONE of this is actually about protecting young people.  It's about a desperate desire to turn back the clock and keep all that self-published stuff from reaching into any more wallets.  Really, it's almost sad.  Because we all know that as we speak, there are entrepreneurs all over the globe setting up adult oriented ebookstores and all of those people want to keep any more "naughty" money out of Jeff Bezos' wallet.

Would it do any good to remind anyone that getting around the rules created a whole closet industry during the first prohibition?  Would it help to remind everyone that the first prohibition DIDN'T WORK EITHER?   Probably not, because desperation doesn't leave room for facts or common sense.  It does leave room for a big pitcher of martinis though and the publishers can be glad of that once they realize that the power-shift to the readers isn't a temporary phenomenon.

It's a brand new world, but at least we can toast to it, right?