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Hello kiddies, it's the AOFM again, coming out of his little hidey-hole like an enormous cursing, meth-and-Tourette's-Syndrome-riddled prairie dog with rabies and jock itch.

Just wanted to tell you that Mary Anne's latest 3-for-2 deal is up on the website - The Dangerous Relations Bundle. That's right, you can now buy her three contemporary romances (Seducing the Billionaire, Griffin's Law, and The Office Ink) and get one of them absolutely free!

But hey, the "get one free" deal only works if you buy the other two. So do it today! It's available for the Kindle, Nook, and many other readers via Smashwords.

ALSO - it's a big secret so don't tell anybody, OK? - Mary Anne's romances are now available on Kobo! You know, it's a new site, if the hoi polloi hear about it then it'll get all crowded and you can't get in, yada yada yada... anyways, the bundle will show up there soon. Coming soon as well are buttons to allow you to purchase all the books from the book list page on Kobo.

Oh well, back in the hole I go... GAEIWNDLF)(@&&#@*^^%#!*&^!

Recent studies say that stress, particularly job stress, has women so stretched and frazzled that sex is disappearing from their radar screens.  One such study found that 6 of 10 British working women believe that job stress "dramatically affects their sex lives."   

Author Jilly Cooper says:

Women don’t want to have sex anymore because they have too much on their plates.“Doctors’ waiting rooms are absolutely brimming these days with women suffering from low libidos,” Cooper told The Telegraph.

“I have talked to a lot of young women about this, and they just don’t seem to do it any more,” Cooper adds. “Honestly, I suppose it’s because we all have so many other demands on our time now.”

And stress has the opposite affect on some women.  A travel magazine study found that 40% of women in their 20's had a one-night-stand while on vacation and 10% of them average more than 4 sexual partners a week.

Maybe it's just that the young have more energy.  Maybe it's that they haven't yet formed dreams and had them crushed beneath the relentless burden of daily stress in a world gone mad.  I don't think it's just sex that women are too stressed for these days.  So many of us feel like the camel - one more straw will be one too many for our backs- our psyches- and our lives.     

Romance novels allow women to escape long enough to shed a straw or two from their load, so they can keep on keeping on a bit longer.  Combine that escape with racy, raunchy and over-the-top bad boy sex a la Fifty Shades of Grey, and it may even perk up enough interest for a mattress mambo. 

Hopefully we'll all get to chill out soon.  Until that happens, I'll be reading a little romance to give me an escape hatch and writing a little more to provide one for all the other women out there who, like me, are tired of racing rats.  Right now, I'm working on a new one for my Forever Series - this one is Peter's story and it's gonna be good.  I hope it'll hit the shelves in time to be on everyone's Christmas list.

Until my new one is out, boogle on over to my book list and pick up one to rev your engine enough to speed straight  through your 9 to 5 and wind up in your bedroom for the best kind of nightcap.  

At last - at long, long, endlessly long last - my new book - Dangerous Relations:  The Office Ink -  is out and available.  This is the third book in my "love and the law" line, which we call "Dangerous Relations."   The books out so far aren't related, so they're not really "a series" - except for the fact that they occur in Myrtle Beach (my home town) and some of the characters recur and/or know each other.

Okay, maybe it's sort of a series.  Except it's not.

This one arose when my demented mind began pondering the old cliche - "never dip your pen in the office ink."  Before you'd have been able to call the little men with a padded truck and a straitjacket, the office had become The Ballinger Law Firm in Myrtle Beach.  It came fully equipped with Mommy lawyer, Daddy lawyer and two battling lawyer brothers - Jed, the firstborn and Mark, the younger brother. The brothers couldn't be more different - except that underneath their differences, they're an awful lot alike.

For one thing, they're both very competitive - or at least they are on the surface.  Perhaps, beneath it all, the only one competing for anything is Mark.  Exactly what he's competing for only becomes clear late in the story.  Mark is very much a central figure in the tale - despite the fact that he never appears as a living, breathing character.  As the story opens, Jed hears a scream, which catapults him to consciousness - much to his regret.  He finds himself on his office sofa, where he's passed out after taking a physical beating following the emotional one he delivered to Gemma, his associate - the lady who just screamed - the lady he and his brother both wanted and neither could have.

See, Joe Ballinger and Sophie Ballinger, parents of Jed and Mark and Senior Partners at the family law firm had a rule forbidding anyone from dipping their pen into the office ink.  Translation - no hanky and no panky at the office.  That prohibition should've been reason enough for Jed to have  listened to his parents a few months back at the interviews at the Law School.  Gemma walked into the room to interview for an associate's job right after Mark hired the candidate Jed would've hired.  In exchange for Jed backing down and letting Mark hire the disputed candidate, Sophie promised that Jed could have first choice of the others.

When Gemma Marshall walked in the room for an interview she captured both brother's interest.  But Jed was locally famous for his success with the ladies.  He was the designated Damsel Delighter of the Esquire Club, a group of Myrtle Beach lawyers dedicated to the bachelor life.  The Club would send Jed the name of the next lady he was charged with seducing.  After he succeeded - and he always succeeded - they'd carve a new notch in the ceremonial gavel.  There were a lot of notches.  But Gemma? From the instant Jed laid eyes on her, he knew she was someone he had to hold onto by any means necessary.

It took some maneuvering to get Gemma to accept the job Jed insisted on offering - over his parent's objections - but finally he backed Gemma into a corner so that she had no choice.  But once she joined the firm, the sibling rivalry became local legend and an office joke, although it was no joke to the brothers.  Her presence created a pressure cooker for Jed - he wanted her more with every passing day but he couldn't have her and he couldn't have anyone else either.  Jed's family and friends wanted Miss Marshall gone and Mark was convinced Jed would return to his ingrained Damsel Delighter ways, betray Gemma and then she'd turn to Mark.

Well, the day did come when Jed had taken too much, been pushed too far, had changed too much from the man he'd always been.  And his Esquire Club buddies picked the right night to push him into joining them at a strip club where they'd arranged for all the strippers to be especially friendly to Jed.  Even though the touch and taste of her made him sick - literally- Jed ended up taking the stripper back to the office bcause he thought it would help him get himself back.  Instead, it cost him everything.

Gemma walked in to find Jed and the stripper naked on his office sofa.  So Mark turned out to be right - Jed did betray Gemma.  But Mark also turned out to be wrong - he didn't win the lady and ride his Harley off into the sunset. Because that scream that awakened Jed the morning after his go-round with the stripper and his later go-round with his brother?  That was Gemma screaming when she discovered Mark lying bloody and dead, very dead, on his office floor - just a wall away from where Jed had crawled onto his sofa and into a bottle to try to drink away his troubles.

But Mark is found holding a bare-breasted photo of Gemma cavorting in a waterfall.  So not only did Jed have all the motive in the world - Gemma had a few reasons to have killed Mark as well.

The appearance of Mark's ghost should make solving his murder a cinch - except that he appears only to Jed and refuses to disclose the killer's identity.  Well, he doesn't so much refuse as claim that he can't because it violates some after world code of ethics.  Either way, Mark keeps insisting that Jed has all the clues he needs to solve the crime.  If that's so, Jed just can't see it.  He sees the puzzle, but he can't make the pieces fit.

And Jed better figure it out soon - if he wants to avoid being convicted of the crime.  Because the trial has started, the Judge has named Jed as co-counsel in his own defense and all Jed can see is how he still feels about the woman who betrayed him in ways he never imagined possible.

Will Jed be able to put the pieces together in time to get the real killer convicted, save himself, and see whether he and Gemma might still have a future together?

Pick up Dangerous Relations;  The Office Ink to discover how dangerous, enticing, and deadly pen dipping can be. You'll never look at ink the same way again!

This is a brief post to highlight one that Joe Konrath has up over at his blog  Joe's blog is a Newbie's Guide to Publishing and the post up now is titled "Pushing the Button,"  written by author Jude Hardin.  It deals with Jude's struggle about when to quit the day job and write full time. 

Yes, Virginia, Jude pushed the button and in this post he explains the struggle to get to this point and how he got the courage to live the dream. 

Not only does Jude explain the inner and outer journey that got him to this point, but Joe Konrath gives tips on how a writer knows it's time to stop dreaming and start writing full time.  It's a great post from Jude and fabu tips from Joe. 

Writing full time is my dream too.  I'm not at the point where it's possible yet.  I'm still trying to write my way to writing full time.  Recently, I've made a conscious decision to set aside more time for writing so that I can push out more books for my fans.  More books mean more sales and that is the path to paradise - writer style. 

Over the weekend I'll blog and give y'all all the lowdown on my new one that's out now and I may even toss out a hint about the one I just started.  My WIP is the next installment in my Forever Series - it's Peter's story.  Fans have been asking for that one.   And I love hearing from readers.  It's nice to know that there are folks crazy enough to take a trip over the top with the duck lady.

Now, all I need is a mass outbreak of insanity to spawn a horde of new risk-takers ready to live life from the most radical POV - over the top of reality.  Trust me, folks, the view from the top is good, but the view from over the top is better.

And each sale brings me one step closer to pushing that button too.  In the meantime, pop over to Joe's place and give Jude's post a read.

I've now finished reading "Fifty Shades of Grey" by EL James. As everyone on the planet likely knows by now, Grey is a trilogy and "Fifty Shades of Grey" is part 1. The books have received everything from lavish praise and adulation, to a life-changing movie deal for the author, to scorn and demeaning comments for the writer and the book's fans. I must've been fated to read it because I was still mulling over whether the books were worth the investment when my eldest bought me Fifty Shades in paper for Mother's Day.

And no, there was nothing weird about the gift. Zack had heard me mention it and recalled my saying that it was written as a tribute to Twilight. Zack's a big Twilight fan, and he knows I like tribute books (mine - Dangerous Relations: Griffin's Law is my nod to Grey's Anatomy).  So, being a thoughtful child, he picked up this one for me.

Here it sat, in my house as a gift for Mother's Day.  I hadn't decided whether to take the plunge and buy it - and this is where I have a confession to make - I'm not an erotica reader. My first acquaintance with the genre came with my first ebook publishing venture -  way back before Amazon built  the Kindle,  when no one ever dreamed that books would be mainstream in any form but paper, there was a little company called Mobipocket.  I first epublished there (later, Amazon bought Mobi and used the platform/engine to build the Kindle). Erotica sold better on Mobi than anything else, so I'd occasionally peruse the covers. Floating torsos.  Multiple torsos. The covers would show three or four men and one woman or sometimes several women and one man, and all of them would be naked and hovering. 

Ick.  What that reminded me of was growing up in a little town called Hartsville, SC where there was one of  THOSE drive-in theaters.  And sometimes, even respectable married ladies would venture in.  My Mom and my aunt took me and my cousin a couple of times as elementary school kids.  They told us to sleep in the back seat, but as long as we were quiet, they weren't going to interrupt their guilty pleasure to spank us for not sleeping.  Invariably, in the movies someone would show up for their first day at a new job and before they'd even filled out the tax forms, everyone in the office would be naked and going at it hard.  Or someone would move into a new house and order a pizza but they'd end up with the delivery guy, the plumber and welcome wagon ladies who brought a lot more than bundt cake.  It sort of put me off the genre.  As young marrieds, my hubby and I would sometimes rent one of those movies to enjoy together and as we wandered around the back section of the video store, I'd hand him a box and ask -- does this one look like it might have a plot?  (In case you're wondering, the answer always turned out to be no).

I hadn't decided whether I wanted 5o Shades, but it seemed to want me.  It's nice being wanted.  Then I started hearing high and mighty PC types calling Fifty Shades - "Mommy Porn."   Okay, if the PC crowd hated it, then I had to give it a try.  At least there are no floating torsos on the cover.

...continue reading "What Could Be Stranger Than Fifty Shades? My Review"

I told you it was coming soon, didn't I? Mary Anne has been extra diligent and the uploading fairies have been on her side, and now Dangerous Relations: The Office Ink is available on the Kindle and the Nook!

The link to get to the book in our book list page is in the sidebar and... hey whaddayaknow, it's right here too!

Those buttons will multiply once we start uploading the book to other online distributors, and hopefully we'll get it to you in paperback as well. In the meantime, if you have a Kindle or Nook, enjoy!

Hello kiddies! It's me, the Husbinator.

Mary Anne has been working for months on the latest addition to her book collection, that being the third book in the Dangerous Relations series, where love and the law intermingle. However, the work is almost finished! We're in the home stretch now, getting it ready for uploading to Amazon and other e-book outlets.

The title of this one...

Dangerous Relations: The Office Ink

 The phrase refers to an old saying, "don't dip your pen in the office ink", i.e., don't get naked with coworkers.

Here's my most visible contribution to the book - the cover. Check it out and see what you think (click on the picture to see it full-sized):

 

Keep watching the sidebar and our book list page for the next week or so. It'll be there soon!

Quacking Alone Romances is running a Spring Break Sale through April 10th. You'll save 33% off every book in our inventory by doing the following:

1.  Go to QA's page at Smashwords by clicking the link;

2.  Pick up any/all of our books;

3.  At checkout, enter the following COUPON CODES to get 33% off: 

The Duke of Eden: FL28R
The Billionaire's E-mail Seduction: ZH33A
Dangerous Relations: Griffin's Law: JF78P
Brotherly Love: NM44Z
A Sixth Sense Of Forever: ZW94A
A Golden Forever: HW62F
The Forever Series Bundle: SZ28S

DON'T MISS THIS CHANCE TO SAVE 33% THROUGH APRIL 10TH. ONLY READERS SMART ENOUGH TO FOLLOW QUACKING ALONE AND USE THE COUPON CODES WILL GET THE DEAL. 

So, open up a new tab in your browser, use the links, and load up your ereader  with great books for the long Easter Weekend holiday - or for the full Sprink Break week.  Remember, Smashwords has formats that will work for every device on the market - so if you want to read on your PC, Laptop, Ereader or Smartphone, Smashwords has a format for you. 

Who wouldn't take advice from a crazy duck lady?  Waddle on over to SW and enter the code to save 33% THROUGH APRIL 10th ONLY.

7

Sorry to disappoint you guys, but it's me, the Dear Hubby, instead of the Quacked-Out Duck Lady.

She's experiencing some of the fun I used to enjoy, mainly formatting e-books to satisfy the jackals at the various digital distributors. Given that, the full-time job, the bills, the laundry, and writing her wacky romance novels, she didn't have the time or energy to deal with the blog this week, so I'm doing it. This is taking crucial time away from my more important tasks, mainly ARRRRRR WHAR BE THE WENCHES AND THE GROG ARRRRRRR!

First, some news on our website(s). I've taken the time to change the e-book covers to reflect Mary Anne's title changes on her contemporary romances. Her contemporaries weren't moving off the digital shelves as quickly as the historical/fantasy romances, so we discussed possibly bundling them at some future date. Of course, there has got to be some unifying theme to help tie the bundle together, so when we looked at the nitty-gritty essence of the two current contemporaries and the one she's currently working on, we found a hook - Dangerous Relations, where relationships and the law intersect and many times conflict.

So now we have Dangerous Relations: Seducing the Billionaire and Dangerous Relations: Griffin's Law, with Mary Anne currently pounding away on the third one. No, I'm not telling you what the work-in-progress is tentatively titled, leave me alone you freaks.

I also fixed our Nook links on the Complete List of Books page, which were all broken due to Barnes and Noble introducing their Pub-It service, a direct competitor to Amazon's Kindle Publishing. It's aggravating to deal with, but I understand the necessity of the computer programming changes.

Now onto the meat of the blog post. The other day I encountered, on a fairly well-trafficked comedy website, a piece written by a male feminist.

I struggle to understand the very concept of a male feminist, or any other (what I see as) self-hating political activist.

...continue reading "Male Feminists – The Ultimate in Hypocrisy"