Husband slash webmaster here.

Quacking Alone is having some difficulties with e-mail contact forms as of the moment, so we deeply apologize for any problems this may cause any of you out there who want to contact me or Mary Anne.

I am working on the issues. We will hopefully have everything working correctly soon. I also apologize for stomping on my wife's update.

Angry Old Fat Man

UPDATE:

E-mail forms are working as of May 23, 2017 8:50 AM. However, you will have to type in a subject line for the e-mail form instead of having it default to something meaningful. Sorry. Mea maxima culpa.

Hello there girlies and boy...ees...

Anyways, my wife the Duck Lady has finished up bundling the Seducing The Guardian series. I put it up on the site in a brand new section I created for you, our customers. I broke out the bundles into a separate section from all of the individual books, and I put a link to the section in the upper menu and the sidebar section list.

Mary Anne has also created paperbacks for most of the books now on Amazon's site. You see, a site called CreateSpace used to let you do that, but they got bought out by Bezos and his boys, so now Amazon is the one-stop shop for paperbacks and e-books.

Because of the dominance of Amazon, and the use of mobile devices in looking at webpages now, I have pretty much thrown away all of the old purchasing buttons and replaced them with much, much bigger Amazon buttons.

As an aside, I replaced all of the e-mail links with web forms, to keep the spammers away.

So check out all the new pages and see what you think.

And while you're at it, read my little sci-fi/political satire series, The God Emperor of Soon (links below).

Installments 1, 2, 3, 45, 6 , 78, and 9.

Sorry about that my dearies. Big old nasty husband here, by the way.

I was in the process of writing up the fifth installment of my dumb little series "God Emperor of Soon" and clicked the Publish button instead of the Save Draft button. I unpublished it as soon as I could, but the incomplete post still hit Twitter and possibly other social media that Mary Anne happens to be using.

So if you get here by clicking a link that goes to a non-existent page, that's why.

Many apologies, and have a relaxing Labor Day.

Angry Old Fat Man

Hi kids, it's me the Angry Old Fat dude comin' atcha once again.

I've got some more installments of my little online series The God Emperor of Soon lined up and ready for your perusal - or ridicule, or whatever. Haven't gotten any feedback on the current two installments, so I don't know if you like what you're reading or not. Alls I know is, a little more exposition in the third installment, then finally action starts on the fourth one.

ANYWAYS...

Good news on the Olivia Outlaw front. She's finished up her Seducing the Guardian series of gay romance, and the latest book is now available (as always) on the Amazon Kindle and compatible devices! YAY!

I've also updated the website to show the book, Enticing Duty, in the sidebar and on the List of Books by Olivia Outlaw.

So hit one of those links above, get the book, and get to reading! Don't make me go get my belt...

Hello my little chitlin's, it's your big daddy Angry Old Fat Man here.

First off, Happy Mother's Day to all of y'all with rugrats, or former rugrats like ours. Remember, if Mama ain't happy, NOOOOObody's happy.

And now the business at hand.

It seems the website for Quacking Alone Romances needs to be brought properly into the 21st Century. I got word the other day that Google is going to start ranking pages according to their ease of use on mobile platforms, like smartphones and tablets. Of course I ran the website through its paces in the Mobile Friendly Test Tool that Google provides and it came back with abysmal results. Not surprising, since smartphones were barely a thing when we first started this romance-writing-and-selling business.

But now, with everybody and his brother, aunt, uncle, and teapot Chihuahua using iPhones and Samsungs, AND with Google busting our virtual balls, we're forced to update the site. Luckily, I decided to give the heavy lifting of the website coding to WordPress early on in our business start-up. That decision will allow one dude, moi, to update the entire site in a matter of days if I simply find the right theme to institute and tweak.

So that's the big announcement. Look for huge changes soon in the website you're looking at right now. And in the meantime, buy Olivia Outlaw's latest same-sex romance Seducing The Guardian, Book One - Tempting Duty.

Over and out, kiddies.

It's the husband of the Crazy Duck Lady, with the simple announcement that all of her Carnal Collateral books have been published and are online, waiting for you guys to download them and salivate over them (or whatever it is you do).

You can see the last one, Devil's Delight, in the sidebar and the Olivia Outlaw books page. Or you can click the links I just graciously provided for you out of the (diminishing) goodness of my (cold, black) heart.

Sorry I haven't been updating. Not motivated enough to be creative. Been too angry at situation, work, life in general, and the attempts to maintain my much coveted status as one of the rich. You know, the rich. The ones near the age of 50 working two part-time jobs to keep the luxuries of such extravagant lifestyles, like living indoors in small houses with electricity, plumbing, and food. And no retirement money or plans at all, and no medical coverage. The Affordable Care Act apparently has, in one of its several thousand pages, a provision that says "health insurance shall be affordable to all - except ANGRY OLD FAT MAN, who is too rich to enjoy all benefits listed in this document without paying out his ass".

I hope everybody who came up with and approved of such a travesty burn in Hell while being raped by the barbed penis of Satan.

Hey babies, it's the Angry Old Fat Man again, touching base with all of Mary Anne's/Olivia Outlaw's readers.

always_angry

News item #1: Olivia Outlaw has completed Book Two of the Carnal Collateral series: Devil's Demand. It's currently out on the Amazon Kindle. Which leads me to...

News item #2: The buttons that allow you to buy Mary Anne's/Olivia's books from other vendors besides Amazon may be dead for awhile. You see, Amazon has some new ways of distributing e-books, especially if you're a voracious reader (like many of you aficionados of romance novels), and we are now participating in these new methods of distribution.

One is called Kindle Unlimited, and it's a lot like Netflix for e-books, except better. You pay a monthly fee to enjoy access to over half-a-million titles on your Kindle or any other device that can use the Kindle store.

The other one is only for Kindle owners with Amazon Prime, and it's called Kindle Owner's Lending Library. You can "borrow" books FOR NO ADDITIONAL COST other than your Amazon Prime account, and that's in addition to all of the other benefits you get from that service.

There's only one bit of bad news. For authors to participate in these Amazon programs, they must publish exclusively via Amazon for at least a few months. No Barnes and Noble, no Smashwords, no other vendors for those months - just Amazon.

News item #3: I fixed the links to Olivia's book covers that were not correct. They look OK now, but if you find one that isn't, please contact me or Mary Anne and I'll get it working right.

Thanks, sweeties, and remember, don't get angry. THAT'S MY JOB!

Hey babies, it's your rockin' and rollin' favorite angry old fat dude here. It's been a long time since the last post, so I just wanted to reassure you, Mary Anne's/Olivia Outlaw's readers, that we're doing OK and nothing super bad or good has happened. We're just busier, that's all.

A second job for yours truly has resulted in more neglect to the website, and the Crazy Duck Lady has had her full-time hours reinstated for her day job, so she has less time to grind away at video slots the latest books in her two ongoing projects, the Carnal Collateral male/male series and the Forever faerie series.

Well, I finally had to break down and update some more behind-the-scenes stuff on the website. Of course it had stabilized so now Yahoo is hard at work trying to screw it up again. At any rate, I got the updating done tonight, so the site should comply with their little rules and regulations and they can stop bothering me so I can stop thinking about ripping their faces off and rubbing course sea salt onto their raw exposed face muscles and letting diseased rats chew on their fatty little cheekbones.

Night night! Sleep tight! Don't let the rodents bite!

P.S. I'll update the website a little more soon with proper cover pictures while Mary Anne gets her freak on with the man-on-man action.

Hey guys, it's me, the hubby.

As promised before, the Sultan's Toy Bundle is now up and available for the Kindle. We're having some technical difficulties getting it onto Barnes and Noble for the Nook, but we're working on it.

That's not the only place where gremlins have chosen to attack.

Too late...
Too late... I hate you little bastards...

The website has been going blinky at times, saying "Error in connecting to database" or some such thing. It looks to me as if the current WordPress version has problems with spam busting it open, but who knows. All I know is I'm the poor schmuck who's got to deal with it. Called tech support the first couple of times it happened and got them to fix it. I then think I figured out how to fix it myself.

As I was typing up this post, it tried to go sideways AGAIN. Ugh... what a pain in the ass.

I swear, if this keeps up, I'm moving this stuff over to GoDaddy... for obvious reasons:

Highly technical reasons.
Highly technical reasons.