Other Entertainment


Hey guys, the Irascible Corpulent One here.

I was puttering around on the computer yesterday (as if that’s any different than any other day) when the beloved eldest child o’ mine – the 20-year-old – came in and started discussing a movie that’s coming out soon: The Rise of the Planet of the Apes.

He was bemoaning the fact that originality in movies is practically non-existent, and that every movie in the past ten years or so (with few exceptions) is a remake, a reboot, a sequel, or a prequel. The eldest was flabbergasted that they were now getting ready to release a prequel to a reboot of a movie from the 1960s.

Oh boy, did I have bad news for him. Did I ever.

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Romance Novels Can Be as Addictive As Pornography?

The piece cites that romance sells more than inspirational/self help, notes that women prefer romantic stories to porn and points out that some women who read romance leave their hubbys – so it’s an addiction.

Absurd.  Completely nuts. And that’s the Duck Lady sayin’ that!

If you’re addicted to romance - DON’T TREAT IT, FEED IT – BUY MORE BOOKS & MAKE SURE A LOT OF ‘EM ARE OURS!!

This Grey’s Finale, “Unaccompanied Minor” had a big ole’ meaning that none of the fans were aware of until a day after the episode ended. When Shonda Sunshine revealed the secret, many of the fans were still in shock – a little like those relatives of the plane crash victims. While fans still reeled from the emotional trauma, Sunshine dropped the big one. This epi was written to begin the end for the original cast. Most of the Grey’s originals’ contracts have only 1 season to go. Some of them, like Ellen Pompeo – Meredith – have indicated that they don’t plan to renew.

Sunshine says that’s why this epi set next season’s focus to be on the original cast members.  This is how the end begins for Grey’s Greatest. If imagining Shonda’s version of riding off into the sunset doesn’t get your creative juices flowing then call the coroner — you’re most likely dead.

So, lets dust off the swami turban and recall where this epi left everyone and imagine how Sunshine may be setting up their exits. Before we begin individual prognostications, it’s important to check out the writer’s blog, Grey Matter, done by Debora Cahn, who did an ab fab job of writing this tearjerking episode. Debora says that the heartache flu that swept Seattle Grace’s favorite couples was caused by something fans have adored about Cristina and Meredith from day one: their independence. If the cause is who they are, then is there a cure? Perhaps Sunshine envisions Mer and Cristina growing into old crusty ladies who can never give enough to a partner to stay in a relationship.

Are Mer and Cristina destined to spend forever alone together, growing ever older and crustier?

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Chris Daughtry. Adam Lambert. Now, James Durbin.

In a lot of folks’ opinion, mine included, each was the best of the best of their season. None of them won and only Lambert made it to the finale. Why can’t the best performers win American Idol?

The best of the best – those who are great, rather than merely good – well, they tend to be different. The greatest don’t grow in the middle of the road. Their lives, their views, and their beliefs don’t mirror Middle America. Like their personalities, their staging and performances tend to be over the top.

Since that’s how I describe my writing style, I can relate to their over the top styles, even if I only wish I could relate to the performer’s overall “greatness.” But the bottom line is that the middle of the road is where most of America can be found.

And those folks in the middle – they want an Idol who is like them. So, invariably, that’s what they get. The winner of American Idol will be a good singer, a good performer – but not a great one.

At least this year, I was hedging my bets. I voted for James each week, but I also voted for Scotty who is from “right down the road” in Garner, North Carolina. I think that Scotty has a good chance to win Idol, if the curse of my support doesn’t ruin his chances. If he wins, I’ll be very happy for Scotty and his family. And I’d think he deserved to win – out of the crop that was left.

But the finale won’t be the same without the best competing against each other. A James Durbin/Scotty McCreery finale would have been a battle of the best. I think Scotty will be diminished by not having the chance to go against James in the finale.

There’s always next year. Is it possible that America will ever recall that if the best of the best didn’t win we wouldn’t have electricity, the telephone, or penicillin?

Last night’s episode of Grey’s Anatomy was called “Start Me Up.” And it sure got me started. Pardon me for a bit while I crawl up on my soapbox. Because, you see, I think that “Start Me Up” included the biggest gaffe ever made by Grey’s.

And yes, we’re talking about a show where I’ve not missed an episode since it debuted as a mid-season replacement in 2005. That’s more than a little bit sad, if you think about it, but loyalty is so embedded in my makeup that it may be as much vice as virtue. In all of these years, I’ve not seen the GA writers get it as wrong as they did last night – in one particular scene.

I’m talking about the scene where Teddy’s hubby-for-insurance-only, Henry, was under the knife. Thanks to the quickie marriage and the brand new insurance, Henry can now have surgery for a recurring condition he’s suffered from for years that causes repeated tumors. So newly-insured Henry, now Mr. Teddy,  is on the OR table while the Chief and Bailey are operating. Right in the middle of the surgery, a medical student, who’s observing, makes a comment and it causes the docs to examine Henry’s interior a little closer. And what do they find?

There’s a big ole cyst on Henry’s pancreas. Not just any cyst, this one is a big cancerous cyst that is about to burst and kill Henry. So what do the good docs do? They call in Teddy, Henry’s wife, a cardiac surgeon herself, to find out how Teddy wants them to handle the monstrous cyst.  Does she want it removed?  CAKE OR DEATH?

Teddy and Henry, as noted above, are basically strangers.  She did a good deed by marrying him to get him insured.  Like the cliche says, no good deed goes unpunished and the Chief wants Teddy to crawl.  When the Chief demands her decision, Teddy sort of haltingly says they should remove the cyst.  Then it’s time for a half-shell buffet featuring Teddy, common sense, and the Grey’s writers good judgment and excellent reputations.  Because the Chief tells Teddy – not so fast, girlfrog.  You better think about this.

Chief tells Teddy that if the pancreas is removed or mostly removed, it’ll likely make Henry a Type I diabetic.  Can Henry handle such a serious, such a volatile disease?  Does he have a good family support system?  Teddy doesn’t know.  Then again, she doesn’t know much about her new hubby.  That, of course, was the Chief’s point.  Ultimately, she tells them to remove the cyst and Henry survives the surgery.

But let’s back up for a minute.  Grey’s writers crafted a scene where they asked if it’s better to be a living Type I diabetic or a dead man with an intact pancreas.  WTF???  The Chief, while grilling Teddy, notes that Type I diabetes is a difficult disease to manage, so she should carefully consider whether they should operate or not.  Apparently, the Chief thinks that death is easier to manage than Type I diabetes.

Death never seemed like a manageable condition to me.

You see, I’m a Type I diabetic.  Millions of  living, breathing Americans are Type I diabetics.  I’m betting that, like me, every one of them considers Type I preferable to death.  Type I diabetes is a condition that can be managed.  Outside of some rocking paranormal romance novels, death is pretty much a condition that ends all management.

What makes this even worse is that this scene comes from a show that tries to be oh-so-conscientious about how it portrays G/L/B/TG issues, women’s rights issues and even death penalty issues.  Coming from this show this scene looks like a big, obvious, flat-out insult to millions of American diabetics.

Type I diabetes may not look like cake – unless the other choice is death.

There’s not much I’d carry a picket sign for, but if the American Diabetes Association wants to stage a protest over this one, I just might carry a sign.

Mine would read – No, I’m Not Better Off Dead.

It’s the male again, pinch-hitting for Mary Anne who is in emotional turmoil after seeing our oldest son off to Orlando once again.

Thinking about our sons and our relationships with them made me appreciate a recent news story and its ties with universal and timeless themes woven throughout humanity’s broad narrative tapestry much more.

No matter what else you think about the Bible, it can’t be denied that it has been the most influentual piece of literature in mankind’s short history. Its myriad stories collectively cover most (if not all) of Polti’s 36 plots, and Jesus’s teaching via parables allows even those of us who are mentally dense (read: me!) to access deep philosophical concepts.

The parable that is most applicable to Ted Williams, who was the “homeless man with the golden voice“, is the parable of the prodigal son.

Initially, Mr. Williams’ story didn’t intrigue me that much, though it warmed my heart a little. All I had seen was this video (also embedded below), which went viral a few days after its debut.

From the news coverage afterwards, I knew Mr. Williams had given himself over to alcohol, drugs, and crime in the past, and had been sober for awhile but had been reduced to begging on the road, and had some job offers after being (re)discovered. It was good to hear, especially in this economy, that someone so down on his luck and trying to scramble back up from a difficult position in his life was able to get back on his feet again.

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Lots of folks have been writing about how great Grey’s is this season.  Overall, I tend to agree that the aftermath of Grey’s “9/11″ has given the writers lots of new directions to explore.  But the ugly specter of one of those new directions reared its charming head in the last episode, “Something’s Gotta Give.”  After watching the epi and connecting the potential future dots of where it may lead, I’d prefer to rename it – Something’s Gotta Go.

What’s gotta go?  The specter of Sunshine’s Scariest Circle that the writers left dangling in the deviant little brains of some of Grey’s longtime fans, like yours truly.  After all, all of the Grey’s faithful know that Sunshine likes to draw circles.  She’ll show the characters (and us) the other side of some coin by completing an old circle (that viewers didn’t realize was incomplete).  Knowing Sunshine’s obsession with circles is both a blessing and a curse for fans who get drawn into being armchair quarterbacks.  Lots of those fans are people like me – writers.  It’s impossible to keep your mind from writing possible future epis based on what you know of the characters, the show and its creator.   The specter of the possible completion of the circle Sunshine just dangled over our heads is definitely more curse than blessing.  Or perhaps, it’s all curse and no blessing. 

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I haven’t joined the Borg.  I have not been assimilated.  Heck, I’m not even a Star Trek fan – though I live with three (3) men who are.  That’s why I know about the Borg. Their bloody phrase seeps into dialogue at the Casa de Graham.   I know the phrase.  I know the meaning, but it doesn’t fit.  I have NOT been assimilated.  What I’ve been is the victim of a marketing plan crafted by Mr. Quack, my resident diabolical genius.    

Quacking Alone Romances has had a Facebook page for a few weeks.  It existed and I left it alone.  I operated under the theory that if it didn’t bother me and I didn’t bother it then we’d both be okay.  Then I started trying to keep this blog refreshed with daily new content – which I thought would be a good thing – by going in each morning and posting a thought for the day.  

Mr. Quack sat me down and told me that I was getting it wrong.  I didn’t want to update the blog content everyday, I wanted to put the new stuff on the Facebook page.  He said short thoughts don’t belong on the blog, to put that stuff on Facebook.  So, I moved the thought for the day over to the QA Facebook page.  And, I’ve been trying to keep the page updated with new content by going in and posting my thoughts about books, TV shows, the universe and everything. 

Then Mr. Quack sat me down and said I’d gotten it wrong again.  He said that the Facebook page for QA Romances should stay static and only get updated by blog posts.  He said I needed to work on the Facebook page he’d started for me by reaching out to “friend” folks in my network of family and friends and by posting my thoughts there.  He says that social marketing is a necessary evil. 

Well, I’ve gone out to FB and put in some of my favorites there and I’ve started reaching out to “friend” old friends, college and law school buddies and family members. It’ll be nice to have a way to stay in touch with them, I suppose.  But I wonder if my youngest son isn’t right about Facebook.  Sam says that the number of friends you have on FB isn’t about friendship or connecting.  He says it’s just a modern day status symbol. 

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Hi there! It’s the author’s overweight male spouse, pinch-hitting while the mistress of the house summons her muse for other work. I don’t know about those two sometimes.  *suspicious*

Anyways, let’s talk about some changes I’ve been working on. The big thing is that we have a Facebook page now. So those of you who are addicted to the social networking thing (read: Farmville) can now talk about us or to us on the biggest computer social network on the planet. Yay!

The next thing is I’m working on making Mary Anne’s book list page a little more attractive by changing out the text links with cute little rectangular buttons like so:

Buy the paperback from Amazon!

Did you know there weren’t any standard set of buttons for Amazon or Barnes & Noble or any other website that sells books? I know, it’s crazy, isn’t it? So I have to create my own and hope I don’t get sued for adding to their profits.

 Now we come to the content portion of this post: a movie review. Mary Anne and I watched The Lovely Bones last night on one of our many premium cable channels.

WARNING! SPOILERS AHEAD! IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THE MOVIE AND DON’T WANT TO KNOW WHAT’S IN IT, TURN BACK NOW! Otherwise, click the “More” link below.

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Last season the halls of Seattle Grace Hospital got too crowded.  The merger with Mercy West brought in a herd of new folks.  All of the Mercy Westers seemed to be in a continual hunt for patients – and for screen time.  The fans of Grey’s didn’t know or care about the new faces.  They were invaders stealing screen time from the cast that now seems like family.   A bunch of ‘em needed to go.

The problem with that was that Derek was running SG and in typical McDreamy fashion he didn’t want to hurt anyone.  He’d been trying his best to integrate them into the hospital and had even taken one on (April) as his assistant.  Besides, in the economic tsunami of the current economy, most viewers had a downsized somebody right in their household and we wouldn’t view any administrator who downsized a bunch of workers as McDreamy.  (Not even the Mercy Westers who by and large aren’t liked much). 

There were also some story lines that needed to be turned upside down to move characters to another emotional place.  And now that the writers were gonna have time to coddle and confound our favorite characters again, the writers needed them to be ready to make some big changes.  I guess what I’m saying is that SG and its team had driven into a rut and couldn’t get out even though they were headed in the wrong direction. 

One event, one man with a gun, solved the overcrowded staffing and the rut entrenched storylines.  I think of it as Grey’s 9/11.  It blasted away the old SG and forces the staff to start over and build something new.  Just as 9/11 did, the explosion made heroes of folks who didn’t set out to do anything extraordinary.  It made some of them make choices and sacrifices at the point of a gun that they’d never have made after cool reflection.  We’ll watch our heroes who endured so much and lost so much do the most heroic thing of all - get up, start over and move on.

But they’re moving on from a different place.  They’re moving on from the place they picked in the heat of battle.  It’s like I tell my kids all the time – and I had to tell myself very recently – you have to pick the hill you want to die on.  A bunch of the doctors at SG had to pick that hill at the point of a gun.  This season is about dealing with the consequences of those choices.

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