First – a thought about a different “Grey” – as in Fifty Shades of Grey.  Ya know who I think would make a freaking awesome Christian?  JESSE WILLIAMS.  Grey’s Anatomy fans know that he plays Dr. Jackson Avery.  Take a look at these photos and tell me Jesse wouldn’t make a mighty, mighty fine Christian!  It would launch his career into the stratosphere.  Unlike Charlie, I bet Jesse’s time on Grey’s Anatomy has prepared him for the journey.  Just sayin’.  Yo – EL James/Erika Leonard, are you listening?

Grey’s begins with the greatest truth Meredith ever voiced over – Being a mother requires more commitment than anything else – even surgery.  Not a mother in America disagrees.

Bailey and Mer fight over a surgery.  That seems like old times, doesn’t it?

Callie thinks she, Mer and Der are in a relationship.  She’s channeling “Big Love.”

Of course.  Jackson’s Mom walks in while he’s heading towards the nasty in the on call room with his intern.  The same intern who walked into the room to show Jackson the shirt she picked out to prove to his Mama that she was a serious surgeon – not a gold digger.  The impression Mama got?  That intern Stephanie is a temp.  You know what?  That’s the same impression I have.

I’m wondering if the theme of this one is going to be “revelations.”  Mama Avery is revealing some truth to Jackson about remembering his position.  Yep, Jackson was thinking about a lot of positions.

And there’s a man in the ER with a very swollen penis.  It was bees.  He rattles off a story about being outside and making himself a peanut butter and honey sandwich and falling asleep, but yeah, he must’ve gotten some honey on his howz-it.  Even intern Stephanie doesn’t believe that and she’s swallowed a bunch of lines from Jackson.

Then Mer needs someone to take over for her at a princess party with Zola.  To show Z that she hasn’t been replaced by her new brother.  But instead, Z gets replaced by………  a can’t miss surgery.  (How long before Mer starts channeling memories of her childhood, and all the tea parties Her mama skipped for all those can’t miss surgeries?)

Stephanie has to go get Mama Avery for the Giant Penis guy.  Of course, she walks in saying:  ”Dr. Avery, I have a Giant Penis.”  It goes downhill from there, which speaks to the skill of Grey’s writers.

Callie promises to be at Z’s tea party by 6pm.  It won’t matter.  Callie’s great but Mer knows better than anyone that there is no substitute for Mama who says 6pm is too late for a tea party.  It has to be a 4pm.  And if there is no tea party she’s already started turning into her Mama.  It didn’t take long…….

Jo gives Karev a lecture about how he should go meet his father and bond with him. Karev says – discharge him.

It takes Mama Avery 1 minute, flat, to get Giant Penis guy to admit he put his penis in a hornet’s nest.  It takes her less time to totally flatten any hope intern Stephanie had of impressing her about anything.

Penis guy isn’t impressed either.  He’s busy learning the price of discovery.  Revelations aren’t all they’re cracked up to be….

It’s a wee bit….. or maybe a NOT SO WEE bit sad how fast they’ve got Mer bonding with Bailey over breastpumping and walking away from “a moment” with Cristina to pump and bond.  **Big Sigh**

Mama Avery tells the chief she’s going to save penis man’s manhood and wants to come back and have a long talk with the Chief about him coming home with her- the peeps at the hospital pamper him too much.

Jackson tells Stephanie to keep it medical with his Mama….. Of course, he’s telling Steph that his Mama probably already forgot the on call room when Mama walks up saying how nice it is to see them together again, and dressed this time.

Jo tries to get Karev’s Dad into a treatment plan.  He says no.  Then she tries to make Karev go stop his Dad from leaving and he says no.  Both guys scream at Jo.  You know what Jo – when you’ve got TWO men telling you to shut up and stay in your place – it means you’re doing a bunch of stuff right.  You go girl.   She’s really the only intern whose name I remember on a consistent basis.  I have to check with Dr. Google to figure out who the rest of ‘em are.  We all know what that means, right?  Yep.  I haven’t bonded with them.

Paging Shonda Sunshine — hang onto as many of Grey’s Greatest as you can or there won’t BE a Grey’s.

Mama Avery doesn’t make the penis surgery easy for Jackson or Stephanie.  She tells her son – this is what happens when men put there penises in places they don’t belong.

Mer has to run to Z when she falls and hurts herself.  Mer asks if leaving her hurt child for surgery doesn’t sound a little Ellis Grey.  Karev tells her to relax, that she’s a good mother.  But Mer sees the writing on the wall…

And Callie tells failing kidney woman’s spare parts younger sister that she can say no.  And Callie tells herself that she can say no, too.

Penis man’s Mama knew her son hurt himself by putting his penis in the hornets nest.  Apparently, getting stung is his thing.  Hey Penis Guy’s Mom, Did you ever see an episode of Criminal Minds? Go buy the whole series — fast.

Cristina kicks Mer out of the surgery.  She’s been replaced by Bailey – the Doc she stole the surgery from.  Cristina doing the right thing?  That’s not at all like Cristina.  That hurt – everyone.

The Chief tells Jo to stop coddling him.  If his white blood cells are low, he needs a proper exam.  Mama Avery walks in just then and the Chief tells her he can’t go home with her – these fools need him.  He’s right.

Callie runs into Owen whose not leaving because spare parts sister decided to donate her kidney after all.  Callie looks crushed.

Mer yells at Cristina for stealing the surgery.  Cristina tells Mer she’s not as good a surgeon as Cristina is.  Cristina tells Mer she can’t be a great Mom and a great surgeon.  She tells Mer she knows that Mer doesn’t want to be her Mother.  She tells Mer that she let up, that she took a different road.  That they are in different places with different priorities ow, and that’s okay.

And Callie kicks Arizona out.  She says she’s tired of taking care of other people.  I’m not discussing Arizona.  I choose not to do that.

Intern Stephanie sits down at Joe’s with Mama Avery and tries to call her to account.  Mama Avery tells Stephanie that the reason she didn’t have time to put in the catheter was that she didn’t diagnose correctly.  Steph says she didn’t have all the info.  Mama says, When in doubt presume he put it somewhere it shouldn’t have been.

Mer yells at Derek.  For making her choose.  Derek tells Mer he never made her choose. Did he?

No – probably not.  Mer just never realized that in each little choice, she was making a bigger one.  That’s her revelation.   Sometimes the job we ended up doing isn’t the one we wanted.  I can relate.  I need to re-direct my day job into my dream job too.

CHECK OUT MY BOOKS – BUY ONE OR TWO OR FIVE AND HELP A LAWYER find her dream — we all have to wait to see what Mer’s dream turns out to be – but Shonda promised us that it would include Der…….

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